You're lovely.

autrefois:

Economic models explained with cows.

Socialism - you have two cows. You give one to your neighbour.
Communism - you have two cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk.
Fascism - you have two cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.
Nazism - you have two cows. The state takes both and shoots you.
Bureaucratism - you have two cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other and then throws the milk away.
Surrealism - you have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
American Corporation - you have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.
French Corporation - you have two cows. You go on strike, organise a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.
Japanese Corporation - you have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth of their original size and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called ‘Cowkimon’ and market it worldwide.
German Corporation - you have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves.
Italian Corporation - you have two cows, but you don’t know where they are. You decide to have lunch.
Russian Corporation - you have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and have 2. You stop counting and open another bottle of vodka.
Swiss Corporation - you have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them.
Chinese Corporation - you have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim you have full employment, and high bovine activity. You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.
Indian Corporation - you have two cows. You worship them.
English Corporation - you have two cows. They’re both man.
Iraqi Corporation - everyone thinks you have a lot of cows. You tell them you have none. No one believes you, so they bomb the crap out of you and invade your country. You still don’t have any cows, but at least you’re part of a Democracy…
Australian Corporation - you have two cows. Business seems pretty good. You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.
New Zealand Corporation - you have two cows. The one on the left looks very attractive.